Wednesday, November 09, 2011

Manuscript and Dad

I'm kind of in a holding pattern right now. My manuscript is finished and the arm work in preparimg for the publication process has been done. I am waiting for my four rusted confidants to finish their read throughs. Once they get back to me I will be able to tidy things up and be ready to get my book copyrighted. That is a 3 to 4 month process. That will give me some time to get things ready for the future like my website and such. Thank God for my good friend Bob and Dragon NaturallySpeaking. I never could have written a book.

Last Friday I went shopping with my mother-in-law. My main focus for a purchase was some new boots. I wanted to get some easier boots for Emily to put on me. I had done some research and figured the kind with the zipped sides would be easiest. We went to the store I had picked out and got the boots. They were cowboy boots, but I really liked them regardless. My dad always wore cowboy boots too. I know he is looking at me and smiling. Finally, I got my boy to see the light is what he's thinking. I wore the boots out last night and I kept feeling his presence near me. I must say that I like cowboy boots now.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

STL & Handi Love

This past weekend was our 2nd anniversary and we went down to St. Louis with no set plans, but to relax and enjoy our time together. We couldn't have asked for a more beautiful weekend. It was nice being outside and able to roll to most destinations. It was nice going out for a nice candle lit dinner on Saturday. Going out for coffee a couple of times was relaxing, though I wanted to try a new drink -- a salted caramel mocha. They were out of the salt, that was the intriguing part. So I settled for my usual skim latte. While getting our coffee drinks we found out there then October is disability awareness month. I had no clue there was even such a thing. So show a handi some love!

OK, I know I've been really quiet on my blog. I do have stuff to say, I've just been so consumed with my book. I'm getting down to the nitty-gritty. At they have written a little preview on the book here. So check it out.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Permanent and Temporary

I've tried to be very vulnerable and honest on my blog. I just had a moment of frustration and thought that I should blog about it. I was feeling kind of weak, which seems to be the case lately. In my moment of despair/frustration I yelled at God. "I'm only 32!"In that moment I wished I wasn't here having to struggle with everything. That would just be a permanent fix to a temporary problem. Having those moments is rare for me, but they are a reality. I'm sure that others have felt that same frustration/desperation. As I've been able to snap out of it, I hope the same for you. Having this outlet really helps me.

Monday, August 22, 2011


I've thought about this post for some time. About a month ago I saw how close I was to finishing the book and started stressing out about everything I still had to do. About that time we started talking about having a kid. I became so stressed out. Some really good stuff, and I started to freak out. Over the last month I found a comfort level with these things. Ya, the end is nearing for the book project that has been in the works for five years. I became excited and stressed. My excitement wanted to get things done right away and that stressed me out thinking about all I had to do to be a published author. I soon realized that I needed to just relax and do things slowly and correctly to make sure I put out a great product. With that peace about the book came peace about having a kid.The other day in fact I was thinking about having a kid and I put in my voice recorder about that desire. So now these two things that were weighing heavily on me are no more. They will both come about at the right time.

Saturday, July 30, 2011


Recently I've had a couple of doctor appointments. One with my neurologist and the other being my eye doctor. I am on a schedule of a check up appointment with my neurologist every six months . The examination includes checking my upper body strength, vision, dexterity, and blood pressure. The checkup also includes my viewpoint on how things are going. My tests proved to be about the same as last time and I think that's right in line with how I feel things are. My eye appointment went well also. This doctor has seen me for years, I could walk when I first started seeing him. The usual tests were done, reading the lines of letters, testing for glaucoma, and the best eye dilation and the tests that goes along with that. My vision was the same as last year. Finally, I am not fighting an uphill battle. Granted every day is tough, but my symptoms aren't continually getting worse. I guess I have to admit my MS medication is working. I take a shot three times a week and usually the day after I don't feel the greatest, but that's a small price to pay to stay the same over a longer period of time. It sucks that I have MS, but I am so happy it is diagnosed and accept it. Now I am in a place of staying par for the course longer.

Friday, July 15, 2011


When I thought about writing this post earlier I didn't think I'd feel this way now. All of the stuff I've had to deal with over the last few years and this is scaring me most. Emily and I have decided we are ready to try and have a child. We just both really feel in a place of comfort in life and that it's time to try for a Beal baby. Up until now I was just excited,, but now I feel nervous as hell. I guess because now it's a reality. I have so many challenges in life, how can we deal with those and have a child? I can sit here and dwell on all that or just go for it. So let's go for it! I will be blogging my thoughts, my fears, my excitement, and everything else about this along the way.

Friday, June 17, 2011

D-Day & B-Day

Monday, May 16, 2011

Change of direction

This is a topic that has really been on my mind lately. I've been so engrossed in the formatting and editing of my book and the inner workings of publishing it. I started thinking, such a far cry from locomotives which was the last industry I was involved in. Actually, that's really all I knew after high school. I went straight from graduation into the family business. I can't believe where I am now. This got me thinking about where we are today as a nation. The whole climate of our world has changed. So many people having to reassess their entire life. Going from a COM to Mc Donald's just to try and make  rent. I don't know who all out there has had to make life changes like this, but just keep your head up. Things are gonna change. Try your hardest to keep a positive outlook, believe me I know it's hard. If a guy that doesn't see well, doesn't hear well, can't tie with his hands, is in a wheelchair, and many other shortcomings is able to pull himself up and try to figure something else out, so can you. No one is promised life will be easy.  but life is what you make of it. Be encouraged today. If he can do it, so can I.

Friday, April 22, 2011

A day to remember

I will always remember April 22, 2006. That was the day that I came home off my whirlwind tour of hospitals and nursing homes. Those were dark days, but definitely growing days. Hindsight is always 20/20. I didn't realize at the time all I was learning and how much I was growing. My eyes were focused on walking again, not on learning to live from where I was. All I knew to do was keep pushing. And walking again was the goal. Thankfully, my therapists accepting that and kept pushing me, teaching me how to live from the wheelchair along the way. The doctors and nurses were awesome to deal with and at times made my stays feel like I was at home. The time I spent in each place usually brought a roommate. Some were downtrodden and others very upbeat . You all brought something that I needed. Whether it was more compassion for the hurting, a positive way to book at my trials, or even a little laughter. I'll never forget each and every one of you.

Being home has brought some big steps my way. I have done a little traveling (not via an airplane yet). I've gotten married. Became an uncle. Found my sister and nephews. Got a diagnosis . Learned how to use Dragon NaturallySpeaking. There are many more things, but the main thing accomplished is: becoming comfortable with who I am in the wheelchair. Bring on the next five years!

Friday, April 15, 2011

Accepting yourself

Over the years this has been something I've struggled with. It took me quite some time gettingto this place. I can truly say I am who I am and I'm fine with that as far as my disability goes, that is. I've talked about this struggle here many times, but I definitely have internalized it more often. I have struggled with accepting another area of my life. I watch Oprah! I talk about it with people and wouldn't mind admitting it. I would get uncomfortable when guys or someone would call me out, even jokingly giving me a hard time. Recently I have embraced this fact of my life. It seems to have freed me yet again.`I truly feel at peace with who I am, where I am. I haven't stopped thinking about how good this feels. I truly want this for everyone else too. I don't know where you are, the struggles you have, or the show you enjoy watching :-) Let's all be comfortable with who we are,so we can live our best life.

FYI-After today there are 28 more Oprah shows remaining.

Wednesday, April 06, 2011


I've been using Dragon NaturallySpeaking for a little while now. The program is understanding my voice better and I'm becoming more proficient in my ability to make corrections along the way. We both have grown during this time. I'm becoming a better parent and the program is now at least a toddler in its growth. The freedom this now gives me is awesome! I can type and type and not have my hands be worn out. This is an amazing tool. I know this post is short, but I'm proud to say I did it all with my voice. I am so thankful to my therapist for teaching me how to effectively use this program. I had this program for quite some time, but never really knew how to use it. Thanks for reading my two cents on this or perhaps now it's up to a dime. When you get a freedom back that you haven't had in years you just want to talk about it. I promise I'm done, for now....

Monday, April 04, 2011

Spring Break is over!

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Dragon & Child Rearing

This is my first blog written totally with Dragon NaturallySpeaking. I definitely have had to make corrections already, but I feel armed with the knowledge necessary to handle this. The first appointment with my therapist was the most helpful. During that session he told me to treat the program as a two-year-old. When you are first starting out there will be numerous times you need to correct the chid. The longer you use the program and teach it your voice and make the necessary corrections it will grow up. Every time there is a mistake you need to ask yourself is the mistake the child's or was it yours? I will be honest as much as I wanted to be able to type this whole post with just voice commands I could not. I feel better about using this program moving forward though. I think using this program will not only help my productivity on a daily basis, but will prepare me in becoming a more patient pareant when the time comes. Also, as you have to formulate what you are going to say before you speak hopefully this will help keep me out of the doghouse as a husband in the meantime. :-) I'm happpy with this program and look for word to being able to type a blog whatever and not have my hands be balled the rest of the day.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Rooting you on

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

What's going on

Sorry for the ending, not edited out.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Magic Ear

I had my third appointment at RIC and am loving forward to learning more about the speech to text program. I have used Dragon before, but never got the most out of it. My therapist is really helping there. My sister and brother-in-law took me to this appointment again, plus my neice B. I love me some B time! After the appointment we headed to the cafeteria to eat our Nutrisystem lunches (I'm loving the weight loss). As we were talking I mentioned that one day I'm gonna go to an audiologist. My hearing sucks! If there's any outside noise: driving, tv, or restaurants, I'm not really able to partake in the conversation. If I don't know what's being said I just make up a story, which can be more fun:-) Lately though I've just grown weary of this and just get frustrated. My sister mentioned the "Magic Ear" at Walgreens as a cheap and quick alternative. So on our way home we stopped and got one. After getting it all set up I gave it a try. Oh my god, I could hear! In fact I was told my talking volume was better too. I can't wait to try it at a restaurant. Plus, it's not too crazy looking, itlooks like a bluetooth headset. So, "Magic Ear" seems to have pulled a rabbit out of 6the hat for me:-)

Thursday, January 20, 2011

A test

Well, about two months ago I decided to do a test. A test on medication I'm taking and it's effects it really has. Before I started taking ampyra, "the walking drug" I blogged about starting it with guarded optimism. I then blogged about it helping my vision.I was convinced it was helping. But I wanted 66666666666666666666to be sure. So about two months ago I stopped taking it altogether. During this time my eyes were blurrier and my energy waned. I still was determined to really be a good judge on this and make sure I was true to the test. I really wanted to show myself that even though I was guarded befor5e starting I let my guard down and just thought it was working. Two weeks ago I decided to start ampyra again. I truly thought I'd take the month I had left and be done. I'm now convinced it works. My vision is crisper and my ener5gy is up. Most days I feel good enough to workout, which definitely wasn't the case over the past two months. Today I( can confidently say that ampyra is working.

PS-Next week I go to another day of traini9ng on Dragon Naturally Speasking. Things are going good there too.
Thanks` Matt & ED!